Thursday, February 24, 2011

A Diary of Ray. (Part 8) End.

8




Lights flashing and flickering , casting an eerie glow upon us. Why isn't stars twinkling at us anymore? I held her in my arms tightly, running along the corridor towards the emergency room.

Staring into Christine eyes as I’m trying to prevent her slowly fading life from ebbing away as i can only watch on helplessly. her eyes were bloodied and bruised , scars marked her face, marked her as an unfortunate victim of road rage. Tears I fought so hard to keep within began to roll my cheeks.

I had to be dragged back from the emergency room. Looking at the nurses pushing her in, looking at her being pushed away, away from me . Oh God why? Why the light of my life? The only angel i have ever known. "You re gonna be alright. "I chanted it feverishly like a mantra. I prayed to every God there is out there. Please make her well again in Your Grace.

Silence pervaded the place while Joe and I stared without seeing at the emergency light. Christine’s parents came after awhile, the looks on their faces proves that they are more afraid than the both of us. The light flickered, the doctor walked out with “disappointment” written all over his face. Million of questions came out from her parent’s mouth before the doctor could catch his breath. As he does, tragedy strikes ! Christine is blind folded when I walked into her room the next morning.

Sound of glasses crashing made my heart skip a beat, I turned the knob, my eyes flecked with golden sunlight . I swept across the scene in seconds, her mother was crying and her dad hugging her mother tightly. Joe was trying to stop her but eventually he failed. Christine was losing it, some people weather adversities, some are battered down by the sheer agony of it, Christine would spend the rest of her days in darkness, I guess its what scares her the most. The loss of light in her radiant life.

I sped up a little, grabbed her hands as tight as I can. She felt around my hands, and lifted her hands to my face. She knew it was me, she grabbed me so tight I could hardly breathe. She wrapped me with her injured arms and pleaded with me not to leave. I hugged and surrendered myself to this moment, whispered “ I love you, more than you will ever know . You showed me the meaning of my existence, to make you happy and never let you cry. But I have to leave you. I’m sorry.”

I kissed her for the last time, and left the room with the pain lancing through me, causing pain such as i had never known, leaving me a hollowed-out shell. Her voice had branded my soul, but for her sake as well as mine, i had to do what i must. Should you never forgive me, i will understand. I pulled her arms off, and gently kissed her for the last time. The moment I pulled my lips away, is the moment the place was silent for a short while. I forced myself to stay a little longer, but my instincts are pulling my body away from her.

Her voice echoed in my head , hauntingly melodious. Repeating the same line, “Please don’t leave, Ray.” I stood beside the door, trying to make a sound but I was silened by Joe’s killer stare. By that moment, I know everything is not going to be fine for Joe and Christine. I stood alone on the rooftop for awhile. I feel my throat began to close and my eyes well up with tears, it’s time for me to go.
I was standing by the lounge, holding my passport on my arms. Stared at the time, it’s 5.30P.M. Christine will be busy having medical treatment, she won’t be having outdoor activities for awhile, so I’m free to go, to leave the country, to leave my friends, to leave my love.

The fog of sadness has clouded my life . The pain of leaving a loved one is more than I can take. I am running from the past, the guilt, and the pain. And you, Christine, are shrouded inside the fog, fighting pointlessly to hold on to a vanished dream. Going to Japan, is a whole new life, a whole new opportunity to meet someone over there. Still, I long to go with you, Christine, but my only response is to shake my head because I know that is impossible. I do not care what others think, I shall bow to you, and let my tears do the talking.


.


2009, 1st Feb. Life is good in Japan, new friends, new school, new environment. 1 year had passed since the fateful incident in Malaysia. I’m cant love someone just yet as my heart is sealed to the girl I met 1 magical year ago.. Just like how Romeo would meet Juliet. School was tough, people here are kind and helpful. Bullet trains or the Shinkansen is my mode of transport here, Takoyaki became my favourite food. I’m all Japanese-fied. My Japanese language is slowly improving as I’m still going to spend 2 years here studying.

I went to Maruyama Park to jog everyday. Yes, like before, I still jog. Maruyama Park is a beautiful park located in Kyoto, where I am living right now. The park was crowded, but yet beautiful. Some embracing the lake, some having fun with their children and some eating ice cream while they spend their time catching up with each other’s life. Love birds are all around the park, young ones and the old ones.

Velvety wings of night is enveloping the park, the sky is glowing a magnificent shade of magenta and the stars are starting to twinkle cheekily. I stood by the lake, embracing the scene while I enjoy the weather. Warmth yet cooling at the same time soothing my soul, allaying my fears

By the time I decided to go home, something caught my attention, something I never thought possible. It’s the sound of someone playing the violin, the melodious yet sad sound invoking countless memories, painful and joyful ones, memories I had sought to lock away in the deepest , innermost part of my heart

A familiar yet faraway figure caught my eye, my breath quickens and my pulse races .God, is this a sign? My only chance at redemption for the person i had to turn my back on? the girl I loved, the only girl that brought joy and meaning into my life? The dark figure I saw in the park way back in Malaysia, the dark figure across the lake.

I have been dreaming this for 365 days, am I dreaming again? Please, please, please, without noticing it tears had streaked across my face. I took flight, ran as fast as I can, along with the pounding rhythm of my breathing I know this is the only chance God will ever give me again, the chance to once again hold the girl I love, the chance to spend the rest of my time loving her again, making her happy.

I ran as I allowed myself to dream , to dream of what could have been and what could be in the future. Every step I take, every second I got closer, my heartbeat quickens into overdrive. Finally,I gasped "Christine , s that you?" She turned around and my eyes flashed through my mind , memorizing her face , her voice , her eyes , her everything. I want to feel her , I want her back in my arms so badly I promised myself , I would never let her go right away.

The moment she turned around , my heart accelerated. I was so afraid of dissapointments. Well, the feeling didn't stay long but instead , tears decided to approach. Her figures were completely matching with Christine's. Her smile , the smile i craved for one whole year. Her hair , her long , smooth hair that brings a firmiliar warm feeling through hugs.

" I miss you. " She decided to begin the long lost conversation with trails of tears rolling down her cheeks. She grabbed my arms tightly , that moment on , I know she is not going to let me go , no matter what.

" Come here. " I opened my arms and she stepped into my heart , once again. I decided to ditch what I had in Malaysia one year ago , the arguements with Joe or the unfaithful car accident. All I know right now is I've got her back , and that is everything I need. We are going to start a new life together , and I know , no matter how hard the future is going to be , we will always be there , for each other , forever and ever.

The end.


Dear readers , this is the second time I repost this story , and yes I decided to rewrite the ending since I got so much complains the last time I post them. Before I end everything right here, I wish everyone with a relationship on hand knows something. Love your mate , always be there for him / her throughout the ups and downs. You won't know , if you were there for them , they know everything is going to be alright. Not to forget trust , yes trust is something everyone needs to build among each other , never lose this key element in a relationship , I mean NEVER. You'll regret , if you do, trust me. Lastly , appreciate what you have right now , you never know if you are going to lose what you have right now , and regret.

I did not copy this story , for your information. Originally written by myself and the help of some friends .

Thank you for reading , have a nice day :)

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